Birds of a feather flock, they say. It has always been a sort of proverb from no particular point of view as far as I’m concerned, until I started to view life from a wider perspective. Groups are seemingly not obvious but very distinct phenomenon in the world. It is no secret that humans form groups unconsciously based on class, traits, and interests. And these are not wrong. The idea behind humans after all is relationships. We have animals in their classes as well. There is an African saying which is: ‘dogs do not make friends with the lions’.
Relationships do matter, and as it is, nobody, but nobody can make it out here alone. The concept of being self made seems to have come to stand, but the truth is there is no self made, someone wrote the books you read, someone inspired you to reach out and reach wide, someone put you into the world. And we are always going to be at the next step as a result of a propellant that came out of somebody. We’ve come to deceive ourselves so much we think we can stand alone in the world, stand alone in groups, stand alone in family and even stand alone in gender.
Also, when it seems there is no group that can fit into us, we start trimming for a group of choice, and when it seems we are not slim enough, we alienate ourselves from all and begin to bastardize the groups, we secretly adored. Even when we are in groups, It seemed to me that people picked their lies or their lies picked them and that’s what they lived. Still I have come to the conclusion that nobody can make it out here alone.
If we were always conscious of the fact that people precious to us are frighteningly mortal, hanging not even by a thread, but by a wisp of gossamer, perhaps we would be kinder to them and mire grateful for the love and friendship they give to us. So I say, in or out of groups, we extend an arm of love to as much people as possible, that way we would be one and maybe, just maybe we would be family, but really, at the end of the day, it is about being true to oneself.
– Dami Ige (RDM Contributor)
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